Find a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life. – Confucius

Working is essential to be able to support yourself and any others who come along.  We all know I complain profusely about the position I currently occupy; it’s a job, nonetheless.  While I am always on the search for an occupation more fitting for my schedule and school requirements, when asked for a specific job title that I’m looking for, I’m completely stumped, as if I just started to take my Managerial Accounting final over again for a third time.  I know what I would like to do in the future, but currently, I have no idea what to even look for.  I would simply like something full-time that pays more than $11.00 an hour simply so that I can pay my bills and live comfortably and that caters to my school schedule.  Is that so much to ask?  They don’t offer than in the “keywords” box, though.

How to Treat Your Coworkers

You have the right to remain silent; what you lack is the ability – Anonymous

 

Today was very stressful at work.  It started out stressful, and it ended with anger.  Things had finally begun to slow down around 22:45 tonight and I was feeling less stressed and more accomplished.  Receiving incoming calls when I am ready to leave for the night seems to be a new trend.  Again, tonight I received a call as I was getting ready to walk out the door.  It was an employee from another department requesting help from me.  This woman was very rude.  She spoke to me like I was stupid and gave me all manner of attitude, all uncalled-for.  I finished helping the woman and informed her that she was extremely disrespectful and that I was her coworker and it was unacceptable the way she was treating me when I was attempting to help her do HER job.  I also advised this woman that the next person she talks to that way probably won’t be as docile as I was at the time.  I know a few people on my team who would have ripped her a new one just for her tone.  One of those people is a pregnant woman and she’s already intimidating, not to mention her hormones are all out of whack which is worse by tenfold.  I wish the call would have gone to her instead, I would have loved to listen to that.

On the plus side, tonight was my review night with my supervisor and, so it would seem, I’m performing quite well.   Imagine that.

The Best Customer Service

Statistics suggest that when customers complain, business owners and managers should get excited about it.  The complaining customer represents a huge opportunity for more business. – Zig Ziglar

Today started out good; everything at work was flowing smoothly.  Until about 21:45.  I was stuck with a customer who wanted on call service for her alarm system because it wasn’t working correctly and she “couldn’t live without it.”  The only problem with that is we didn’t have an on call technician with the skill set for her alarm system.  I tried to explain this nicely and give her an appointment the following morning.  She wasn’t having it.  She screamed and cursed at me for HALF AN HOUR.  I could feel the anger coming on like a tidal wave and I started to talk over her because I was sick of hearing her complaints.  Finally, after asking her to refrain from using offensive language, which she disregarded, I hung up on her mid-sentence.  I was literally shaking with anger.  If she knew how bad I wanted to punch her through the phone, she would have had an attitude check.  If ANYONE talked to me in person the way this lady spoke to me tonight I would have thrown down right then and there.  It’s a good thing I took my break after that call because I needed a time out.

Last, I was getting ready to leave work and just as I was logging out of everything on my computer I had one last call.  Basically, this lady wanted the impossible and I couldn’t do it for her.  She talked over me the entire time I was trying to explain why we couldn’t give her what she wanted.  Already riled up from earlier this evening, I just started talking louder and louder and denied everything she wanted because  A.) it was against company policy, and  B.) I didn’t want to, which gave me the most satisfaction when I told her no.  She informed me that she was going to have me fired tomorrow, so I gladly gave her my name and employee number and bade her goodnight in the sweetest, most innocent voice I could muster through gritted teeth.  I could hear my fellow employees laughing at the conversation because they all know what it’s like, which made me feel slightly better.

The customer is not always right.

Faceplant

The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one. – Oscar Wilde

I found out that there are people working for FedEx who have logistics degrees and get paid $60,000/year to do the same job I do, and I get paid $11/hour.  What’s worse is that I could work the job I have for 20 years and FedEx still wouldn’t hire me.  I just metaphorically walked into a brick wall with my face.

The Customer is Always Right…

Up until this coming Thursday, I work as one of those annoying people who call and confirm appointments in a national call center for a security system company .  As obnoxious as those calls are, they are really just a courtesy for the customer so that we can:

a.  Make sure that the customer wants to keep/reschedule/cancel the appointment.

b.  Make sure that the company didn’t screw up and give the customer the wrong appointment.

Either way, we call to make sure that the customer is happy with what they have.

The employee follows a script throughout the entire call.  The employee says:  “This is Angus Flipinflop from [insert company].  I’m just calling to confirm the appointment we have scheduled for [doomsday].  Does that still work for you?”  If it does, we ask two or three questions pertaining to the appointment.  Seems simple enough, right?  Wrong.  The way that customers act, you would think it was the end of the world.

Some customers are mad because you can’t answer every single question they have about the appointment.  You can only tell them “I don’t know, but I can transfer you to…” so many times.  When you tell the customer that you don’t have access to certain information, or you don’t know anything about the equipment used because you only work as an appointment confirmation representative, they get pissed and go off on a tangent asking what the world is coming to because a few questions can’t be answered by only one person.  We work through temp agencies for Christ’s sake.  We have an entry-level job and we get paid to follow a script, not to know things.  That would be why we have an entire page full of numbers to transfer people to.

Other customers get mad because you ask them questions.  We ask two questions that, apparently, are necessary; otherwise, we wouldn’t ask them.  Duh.  One question that we ask is:  “Who provides your phone services?”  The customer has to have some type of phone service for the security system to work, which makes sense because it cannot communicate to the dispatch center if there is no working phone line available.  It’s not rocket science.  Some phone companies have certain equipment that we have to accomodate, or special things we have to do to work with them to hook up the system.  When a customer asks why we need to know that, I just want to tell them to use their brain.  I figured it out my first day on the job without anyone telling me.  Then the customer is angry because they think we’re prying into their personal information.  I could probably google a person’s name and find everything I need to know.  What I don’t understand is why a phone company is an issue when we have their credit card numbers.  I had a woman call the corporate office on me once over this even though I had my supervisor talk to her.

The second question we ask is:  “Is there any remodeling or construction going on in your home that might hinder the installation?”  This is even more common sense than the previous question.  If you have construction going on in your home and you have to turn off your electricity for a day or so, it’s a problem.  We can’t wire and test a security system with no freaking electricity.  The two most common answers I get are:  “I don’t know” and “What do you mean?”  REALLY?  How do you not know if you have remodeling going on in your home?  I can look in my kitchen sink and see dishes in there and know that I have dirty dishes, so please, tell me, HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW?  People really are daft.

There are also the customers that tell you their life stories.  You ask if the appointment time works for them and they say yes… but only after they’ve told you what happened with Billy-Bob starting ten years ago and how it affected them.  This is when the staring into space starts.  Side effects include:  drooling, nodding repeatedly even thought the customer can’t see, surfing the web for funny pictures, saying “uh-huh” over and over without registering anything that the customer says, laying face-down on the desk, playing Tic-Tac-Toe and Hangman with the person sitting next to you, planning out your finances for the year, making plans for the weekend, etc.  When everything is all said and done, the 30-second phone call has taken 30 minutes and you’re thoroughly exhausted.

Customers change their minds sometimes… repeatedly.  They tell you to cancel… no reschedule… no, that won’t work, cancel… wait, I think I can do the 14th… nope, can’t… maybe… nah… I’ll call you *click*.  They hang up.  Pretty much you either have to leave the appointment as is, or cancel, which can be a tough decision.

Then there are the angry customers.  They’re angry because you interrupted their dinner, or you woke their kids up because the phone was ringing too many times, or they can’t hear you… because of background noise on their end, or because you’re not from where they’re from, or because your appointment times don’t work around their weird-ass schedule, or just because you called.  Do you know how many people get angry with me simply because I called to confirm the appointment?  A lot.  I had a friend at work get yelled at by a black lady because she was white.  Yes, ma’am, thank you for realizing that there are people from many different races who use the telephone, you’re very observant.

It’s hard to help a customer who doesn’t want to be helped.  It’s very rare when I get a person who actually tells me that that he or she is glad that I called.  Not that it matters anymore.  I was promoted to a new position, starting Thursday.  Now I just get to deal with angry customers who are forced to reschedule. Great.

People at Work

This guy looks like his head might explode soon, but we can’t rule out the possibility of extreme constipation.

Working is something that most people, not all (some people find the noble sport of employment beneath them), do at some point in their lives.  While we sometimes make friends at work that are irreplaceable, we also find people that are obnoxious to the point where you feel like your head is going to explode from the pressure of trying to ignore them.  There are too many different personalities to list them all, but from my short work experience I can list a few that I’ve run into.

The first type is the meddlesome type.  There is a particular reason as to why I’m listing this one first.  I actually encountered a person like this yesterday – not the first time, though.  A brief summary of a meddlesome coworker is:  *ahem*  The coworker who barges into anything and everything you do while at work.  This person may even report any small misjudgments, mistakes, or misdemeanors that he or she happens to stumble upon.  Of course, these people can do no wrong in their eyes; hence the reason they are tattle-tales.  This person tends to draw any wrong-doings on his or her part away from the limelight so that the supervisor’s foot does not find a comfortable spot in his or her butt-hole.  They will go as far as to read your emails when you’re not looking, eavesdrop on your phone calls, pick through things at your desk, interrupt your conversations with other coworkers, run around telling others what to do and how to do it, they will constantly be ass-kissers to the boss, and of course, my personal favorite, send habitual reports to the head honcho about what everyone is doing whether or not the supervisor cares.  In my humble opinion, this is the the worst type of coworker imaginable. This person may even tell lies to better his or her status with the boss.  They are nosy, inconsiderate, rude, and think they know it all.  My solution to the never-ending problem of interfering coworkers is to put them in a business together and just let them run it.  It will go under in no time.

Does a mole work here?

The next subject:  disgusting coworkers.  This one pretty much speaks for itself.  I’m sure you know the type.  The kind of person that clips his or her nails at work, leaves dirty dishes in the community sink, leaves crumbs all over the desk, picks his or her nose, talks while chewing food, is flatulent, or does anything else nasty that you can think of.  I work for a place where we have a day shift and a night shift that share desks.  This is a problem because there are truly some gross people that work there.  I have a friend who found ants running in and out of a desk drawer that he sat at because there was a wide array of open food and dirty dishes in there. It was revolting.  The thing about disgusting coworkers is that they always think you like them, so they follow you around.  It’s one of those moments where you close your eyes and pretend you are far, far away in the land of anywhere-else.  It is also the moment where you want to hose this person off, as well as all of his or her belongings, with bleach.

Ask me one more question… this is what will happen.

The  needy person is also obnoxious.  This is the person that asks 20 million obvious questions that he or she could have figured out by him- or herself, but asks you anyway and keeps you from your responsibilities.  This person may be new, but not necessarily.  They cling to you; too scared or too stupid to do anything alone.  It makes one wonder how this person was hired in the first place.  If the person cannot do their work, how did he or she get through the interview for the job without a detailed script?  Don’t get me wrong, it’s healthy to ask questions, but the same question worded differently fifteen times is another story.  The most I can handle is three repeats, then comes the ignoring.  This person lacks initiative.  At times, this coworker can steal your ideas and take credit for them before you get the chance to shine.  This person is the epitome of stupidity.  Two words:  Run away.

The last person I am going to discuss is the  Slacker.   This person does as little as possible 24/7.  He or she does just enough to squeeze by with a paycheck.  They work when the boss is looking, then they do nothing and push the work off on everyone else.  I won’t lie, we all have those days where we just do not want to do anything, so we just do enough to pass it as work, but that’s just once in a while… usually.  That is a completely different story, though.  The Slacker is someone who mooched his or her way to the top, or pretended to be a hard worker, then plateaued and declined.  It is extremely frustrating to be on the receiving end of the Slacker’s work because there’s a lot of it all the time.  I try to be conspiratorial and push the same work back on the Slacker at the last second so that he or she has a crap-load of work that isn’t done in time.  Nine times out of ten, it works pretty good.  Very mature, I know, but after a while, you just get sick of doing someone else’s job.  If I wanted two jobs I would go out and get another one.

There are many more work personalities to hate, but these four are the most obnoxious in my book, as well as the most common.  I have had the unfortunate experience of meeting all of them… multiple times.  I can usually pinpoint them before I even speak to them, then I avoid them at all costs.  This includes, but is not limited to:  hiding behind desks, telling the nearest person to “assign” work to me, running away when the person approaches me, pretending not to speak English, and just staring at them – still as a statue – with a strange face for as long as it takes until they get freaked out and walk away.